John D Morgan Chartered Architect: January 2015

Sunday 18 January 2015

Old Friends

John Morgan cannot be said to be in the best of health these days. The old soldier is suffering from a number of the usual complaints that come with age, including painful ankles, a legacy of an old war wound (he jumped into a swimming pool which happened to be empty at the time and had to go on parade next day). These things catch up with you.

I am sure that both he and Felicity would be delighted to get in contact with any old friends reading this, although John's hearing is also not as good as it used to be. I SAID "YOUR HEARING FATHER IS NOT AS GOOD AS IT SHOULD BE."

"Eh?"

Mother is in perhaps better shape physically, although they both need constant care, provided by an excellent Polish woman who is now beating them both at scrabble.

Give them a bell sometime. They would love to hear from you.

The Trials of a Post-War Architect (From 1951)

Obtaining building approval for couple intending to marry. Obtaining planning byelaw brick & timber allocation (postwar restrictions). Designing & building a house, unfortunately couple breaks off engagement. Client had to sell or rent property to young married couple only.

Byworth, Petworth: Contractor informs me that cow has fallen into the foundations. What should he do?

House in Sutton, Sussex: Lady Saunders complains that boiler wakes her in the morning. We have to move it into the adjoining garage with new chimney.

Red Lion Yard, Mayfair: client has disagreement with painter with regard to the colour that she chose for the dining room, blames the architect and never sees him again. She sells the house to American millionaire who employs us for alterations but on his trip from America, knocks up his mistress (headlines in the Evening Standard).

Architect designs offices in corner of Broadwick & Berwick Street. Client sells the design to 3^rd party. Architect finds difficulty in obtaining fees, ultimately helped by well-known solicitor.

Architect designs office layout in Lambs Condor Street. Client complains that partitions are not soundproofed. Specialists try alternative solutions. Final solution: chairman sacks managing director.

Old Street: architect finds difficulty in extracting fees from client. Finally agrees to exchange drawing for a cheque.

Architect designs layout for estate in Great Park, Reigate. Irish labourers employed to lay sewage & surface water drains have disagreement with client over final payment.

Two years later, owner of house adjoining the lake complained of paper floating on the water. Architect checks final manhole to find contractors had switched drains with dire consequences. Lake drained during hot summer, house starts to subside but returns to near normal when lake refilled.

W. Harold Perry tessellated tiles on fascia fall onto car showroom forecourt. Wrong mix.

Barbecue in basement of Chester Terrace: Smoke leaks into ground floor kitchen, requiring 80 ft. of flexible fluepipe installed.

Shopping centre contractor uses Isocrete (rather like porridge) on roof of supermarket in Cheltenham. Material does not set, has to be dug out and replaced.

Multistorey Refuse & Lorry park for St Pancras Council: contractor goes bankrupt. Work delayed for 18 months. No work, no fees.

Supermarket for Co-Op Grimsby: at the official opening, councilors name misspelt on plaque.

Triangle Site, Harrow: chairman of the National Coal Board requires fireplace on 6^th floor. Chimney punched through 5 floors.

Eli Lilly extension: contractor fails to inform building inspector of the foundations. Local authority insists on contractor digging round the massive foundations to verify suitability even so insists on Letter of Indemnity from client.

Western Glass, Basingstoke: contractor builds extension to warehouse. Brickwork wall collapses in high wind, as it had not been correctly built.

Ashford, Kent: 11 storey office block, water penetration through Alpine windows. Remedial work unsuccessful, sub-contractor admits design fault and then goes bankrupt. Architects sued for 2 million pounds, finally settled at under 1 million.

Craven House Hotel, Lancaster Gate: client goes bankrupt owing architect £6, 000 and £600 due to VAT. Architect refuses to pay and the law is finally changed.

If you can survive all this you’ll be an Architect, my son!!!